The 34-Year-Old-Non-Virgin

Yes, I collected action figures and have had sex. Shocking the two can actually exist within the same realm. It is possible, Hollywood stereo types be damned. Wait? What? Toys? But, you're old(ish). Yes. I collected toys. I collected action figures, high end statues, scaled replicas of vehicles and weapons. All of them, having origins within the area of comics and film. But, what does this have to do with OCD? Easy. Compulsion. Compulsion. Compulsion. Need to want. Need to have. Need to buy. Unlike most people who collect or have, I couldn't control it. It spun out of control and continued to do so for years. That is, until recently.
As a child, I loved toys. Transformers, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Star Wars, DC Super Heroes, you freaking name it. Loved 'em. As any child should at 8 years old. I'd display them in my room, I'd set them up and make huge battle scenes on our dining room table, then proudly show them to my parents. They of course, amused me. What parent wouldn't? Darth Vader, that's who. Sorry, he just seemed like a piss poor father.
Anyway, I eventually grew up, went to middle school, then high school. But, for some reason, my childhood interest that I had put away, had swung back around. I found myself purchasing action figures again. Nerd! This continued into my 20's, post college life, early career life. My interests shifted to more museum quality pieces like statues of Spider-Man or Batman. My collection grew. As did my debt as a result of this "hobby". This went on for years. I amassed an impressive collection, but because of my OCD, because of Phil, I couldn't control it. And currently, it's costing me more than I'd ever imagine. If I saw something I liked, I'd get. Regardless of if I needed it or not. Honestly, you never really need anything outside of a few basics. Water, oxygen, food, love, friends and family. But, for me, I needed it. What I loved had become poisoned and tainted. So, it had to go.
Though, it's not all dark skies and violin music. Unlike say gambling, the money wasn't completely wasted. It was inadvertently invested. Sort of. I recently sold my entire collection on eBay, thanks to a company that specifically deals with collections like mine, for substantially more than I initially paid. They had the knowledge, resources and experience to move everything for the best price. In a way, it worked out. But, the damage has been done thanks to my compulsion.
Now, you might be thinking that because I suffer from OCD, that I feel I'm not accountable for my actions. Like I use it as a crutch or excuse. Let me clarify, I am 100% accountable. Despite my OCD, I'm still a person, an adult, capable of making the right decisions. It just makes things that much more difficult for me at times. It magnifies and intensifies feelings and emotions that normal people can control to a much better degree.

I apologize as this latest post was not as humorous as the last. So, here's a joke:

Scene: Two muffins are in an oven
Muffin 1: Phew, it's hot in here.
Muffin 2: Holy shit! A talking muffin!

Thank you. Tip your waitress.


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