Hyde Park Bruno

Today, I want to take a break from the OCD and talk about being a transplant. Having left NY for NJ so many years ago, I feel it's something I can honestly and accurately speak about. So, my title references a little known 1997 comedy starring John Cusack called, "Grosse Pointe Blank". It's a story about an assassin, Martin Blank, who returns to his hometown in Grosse Pointe, Michigan for his ten year high school reunion. Of course hilarity ensues as he attempts to reconnect with high school girlfriend,  and his past, all while tasked with carrying out a contract hit, at the same time! Comedic gold! It's actually more of a dark comedy versus a straight forward comedy. But, watch it and judge for yourself.
Now, there's a scene in the film where he attempts to return to his childhood home, and reconnect with his roots, but to his surprise, it's been turned into a mini mart. I know, it's seems like an odd choice to open a place of business in the middle of  a residential area, but as we're all well aware, Hollywood is completely disconnected from reality, so, eh. Anyway, he calls his therapist while in the mini mart and states: "You can never go home again...but I guess you can shop there." It's actually a really funny line, and it's been in my head, growing in relevance, ever since I left NY, seven years ago.
So yes, I made the choice to move down to Southern NJ to be with my wife. We had been seeing each other long distance for eight months, on weekends, and we wanted to be together. I knew I wanted to marry her and she wanted to marry me, and at that point, there really was no question for me. I wanted to be with her, as her life was now my life. With my job, I was able to work remotely, so from that perspective, I could easily relocate. In regard to friends and family, it was slightly harder for me to leave them. But, this was the next step in my life. So, I made a choice.
When I left, there was no fan fare, no real sadness, after all I wasn't moving too far away, only about four hours south of where I lived. But, I would still miss everyone. Throughout the years, I've gone up, family and friends have come down, not every weekend, but enough to stay in touch. It wasn't intentional because, honestly, that's life. We all increasingly become focused on our lives as time passes. It happens.
Having lived in South Jersey for so long, I've grown accustomed to being here, because "Home is where you make it." Home is with my wife. Though, there are slight differences that I'll never get use to, people calling sprinkles, "jimmies", if they only knew what a jimmy hat was in NY, mainly flat farm land from a topographical perspective, a beach in close proximity, living close to Philadelphia, and of course, the elongation of spoken vowels. Especially the letter "O". For example, instead of "Home", it's "Hoome", maddening, I know.
Of course, on the flip side, when I go home, so much changes in my absence, that it doesn't really feel like home. When I left in 2009, life moved on without me. Places changed, people moved on, people relocated, things changed. So, I never feel like I belong anywhere at this point in my life. I 'm a man without out a country. Going to my parent's house is hard, because they now have cats and I'm deathly allergic. So, I can never go home again...but I guess I can die there. Kidding. I can never move back in with my parents. No responsible adult can. It's just the way of things.
So after all of this rambling, what's my point? I guess, my point is, relocating and leaving home can be a natural part of life, and it can be done for numerous reasons, i.e. a loved one, a job, wanting to see other places, you name it. But, in the end, it only comes down to you making a choice. No one else. You are responsible for your choices. Right now, with my wife and I separated, I'm facing the reality of being down here alone. My job is here, and I cannot simply up and leave. But, I made this decision. Given another chance, I'd honestly still make it again, without hesitation. 


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